Of Crimson and Shadows
by EndoplasmicPanda
Summary: Despised as a demon, Naruto Uzumaki held his head high, powering through the dark days and marching toward the light of the future. He would prove everyone wrong. Or so he believed. Now, he's the monster everyone thought him to be. And you know what? He doesn't give a shit.
1. Carte Blanche

_*Obligatory 'I don't own Naruto so please don't sue me' header*_

* * *

 **Of Crimson and Shadows**

 **Chapter 1 - Carte Blanche**

* * *

 **"Tick, tock."**

Two tails trailed along great bronze pillars, girdled by darkness, brown and faded.

A low grumble crept through the gaps in between, rippling across the cavern of water and shadow.

The grumble became a cough, then a wheeze.

Then a snort of derision.

Of lunacy.

Of pain.

 **"The winds of time have come to thine with promise everlasting,"** the Nine-Tailed Fox muttered through clenched teeth, blood black as tar dripping from between its lips.

A clawed hand, thin and gangly, came up to caress the bars of its cage. It traced a spiral with the tip of its claw, etching away at the metal.

 **"When wicked fades and life abades,"** the fox breathed, **"to one of diff'rent casting."**

The claw slipped across the bars, trailing down the surface like a raindrop on slate glass.

It laughed.

 **"Tick tock, Naruto Uzumaki,"** the beast slurred, eyes fogged and fading.

The hand fell to the ground. Water, as sick and twisted as the beast that lay among it, rushed from the impact, surface distorted.

A low hum ran through the cavern, energy sapping through the walls like spilled blood through loose earth.

The water stilled.

Silence reigned.

 **"Tick… tock."**

* * *

On the first day, Naruto was scared.

The darkness was unending, stretching off into the horizon in all directions, melding together the sky and the earth with no fixed beginning and no well-defined end.

Infinitum.

He couldn't see himself, couldn't feel himself, his shouts fell onto his own deaf ears. All he could do was sit, and _wait,_ his thundering heartbeat pulsing along in his chest _._ For what, he was uncertain… but waiting was all he _could_ do. His senses blinded, he felt weak, alone – vulnerable.

On the first day, Darkness beckoned him.

Naruto refused its call.

* * *

"Wake up, brat!"

"Wh-huh?" Naruto sputtered, as his sleeping bag was forcibly removed from around his body, the sharp sting of northern autumn air nipping at his exposed skin. "What the hell, you damn pervert!" He rushed to cover himself. "You wanted to see me half naked, didn't you?!"

The white-haired Sannin just stopped and rolled his eyes, turning around and tossing the sleeping bag back at his apprentice's face. When Naruto yelped and went flying backwards from the connection, Jiraiya just smirked. "Come on kid, I didn't even throw it that hard. You need to build up some more muscle."

"I'm trying, y'know!" Naruto said, pulling his orange jacket back over himself, frowning when he realized it was moist from the dew lining everything in sight. "What time is it, anyway? Why are we up this early?"

"You're not gonna get stronger and grow by eating nothing but ramen all the time," Jiraiya sighed, watching as his student struggled to pull his sandals back onto his feet. "And what better time to train is there than at the beginning of the day!"

As if to accentuate his point, Jiraiya struck a pose – stretching his hands out into the air like some sort of gypsy and turning in a single circle. "So _young_! So _crisp_! So _beautiful!"_

Naruto blinked, then frowned in exasperation when he realized that the man was now struggling to hold back a fit of giggles. "You're not talking about the weather, are you?"

"What? Now, why on _earth_ would you say something like _that,_ brat?" Jiraiya scoffed theatrically, donning a face of mock hurt. "You know, if I didn't know any better, I'd say you didn't agree with me."

"I don't!" Naruto yelled, shouting at his sensei at the top of his lungs. A flock of ravens in the nearby trees took to the skies in a violent frenzy, startled by the outburst, and the forest seemed to quiet for a moment in anticipation of more yelling. "You're just gonna abandon me in a field somewhere to train by myself while you go off and stare at women's chests!"

"Would you keep it down?" Jiraiya shouted back, just as loudly. "You're gonna wake up the whole damn country!"

"Yeah? But then at least everyone would know how much of a pervert you are!"

The two shinobi just glared at each other for a moment, before Jiraiya cracked and turned away.

"Fine! You got me." He crossed his arms. "But I'll have you know that the women in this next village are _very beautiful_. So beautiful, in fact…" he giggled again, pulling out a notebook and pen. "Yeah, that's the stuff…"

"PERVY SAGE!"

"Alright! Knock it off! What do you want?"

Naruto narrowed his eyes and pouted. "I want you to _train me!_ That's what I'm _here for!"_

Jiraiya turned and gave him a patronizing glance. "Oh, please. Even if I _did_ try to train you, you wouldn't get it anyway."

Naruto sank to his back, nearly growling in rage. "Come on! I'm supposed to be getting stronger to fight the Akatsuki, and we're out here in the middle of nowhere and you're not even _trying_ to train me! How am I supposed to learn _anything_?"

He narrowed his eyes, his mind suddenly hatching a devious scheme. "You know, if Granny Tsunade finds out you never trained me and always went to peep on girls in the bathhouse instead…"

Jiraiya jumped a solid foot in the air, like someone had taken a brand to his ass. He spun on his heel, and jabbed the butt end of his pen into Naruto's chest. "You wouldn't _dare_ , brat."

Naruto leaned into the pen, wincing only slightly as it dug into his sternum. "Yeah? Wanna _bet?_ "

His eyes were like fire, his face wide and mischievous.

Jiraiya stared at him for a hard minute.

Then, he sighed, drooping forward in defeat. "Come on. I just want to do my research. At this rate, I'll _never_ get my next book published."

"You're not-!" Naruto cut himself off with a snarl, instead shaking his head and leaping back to his feet. "Can't you teach me _anything_ today? Come on, I'll do _anything!"_

Jiraiya froze, a wide grin burgeoning across his face. "Aaaanything, eh?"

Naruto smirked, knowing all too well how weak-willed his sensei was in the face of his… _urges._ "Yeah. Anything. Just TEACH ME SOMETHING!"

"Alright! I'll…" the Sannin paused to think, bringing a finger up to his chin in deliberation. Then, he snapped his fingers. "I'll teach you the Giant Rasengan. Yeah, that's it."

" _What?!_ " Naruto moaned, tugging at his blond hair. "Come _on_! I already _know_ how to make a Rasengan! What good's a _big_ Rasengan gonna do for me?"

"Chakra control," Jiraiya said bluntly. "And you'll be able to make… well, big Rasengans. Why are you complaining?"

Despite how frustrated he was at his godfather, Naruto had to admit that Jiraiya had a point.

It may not have been the _best_ point, but it was a point nonetheless.

"Alright, fine," Naruto grumbled, packing his sleeping bag into a storage seal and shoving it, along with the one containing his tent and supplies, back into the pack on his shoulders. "I'll do it. But _only_ if it's super cool!"

Jiraiya snorted in arrogance. "What?! Of _course_ it's cool! _I_ came up with it! Now hurry up, the next village is an hour away. I want to get there before the elderly find the hot springs."

Naruto filed in behind his sensei with a groan as they began to move out of the clearing, the horizon beginning to blur as the memory faded…

* * *

On the second day, Naruto was _terrified._

The world had been reduced to a dull hum, his brain attempting to accommodate the absolute disconnect of his senses. He grew accustomed to the faded light of life far faster than he was comfortable with, but the overabundance of _nothing_ but time and his own thoughts dragged him inward at a speed which left little room for discontent.

At first, he focused his thoughts on his friends… his godfather… his teammates. The worries of his life – the Akatsuki, Orochimaru, his comrade's fall from grace… everything followed. He dreamed of fictitious solutions to everything, some much more ridiculous than others. He reveled in his imagination, letting it pull him along through the darkness until such time that whatever gods had cursed him to this fate determined he had suffered enough.

Then… then, the debilitating thoughts of self-reflection began.

On the second day, Darkness embraced him.

Naruto barely escaped.

* * *

Naruto jolted awake, his breathing harsh and erratic.

' _Every night this week,_ ' he grumbled to himself mentally, urging his stiff body to rise from the tree he was resting upon. ' _Every night, I have the same dream. Why didn't…'_

He froze, his mind racing at the sudden realization that had blitzed through his thoughts.

' _Why didn't I just let him do what he wanted? Why did I have to insist on training? Why didn't I just…'_

He mentally sighed in exasperation. ' _Just… why?'_

 **Because you were afraid.**

Naruto froze, then scowled, as he jerkily made his way back to the path to continue his journey. ' _Hmmph. Afraid? Me? Of what?'_

 **Akatsuki. Falling behind your rival.**

Naruto could almost _feel_ the voice _smirking_ inside of his mind.

 **Yourself.**

' _Myself?!'_ He mentally screamed. _'Why would I have been afraid of myself?!'_

 **Perhaps not as you were, but as you are now.**

Naruto just grumbled internally, his body moving him down the gravel pathway, the trees lining the road waving in the gentle breeze. The sun had yet to dip down past the horizon, yet the sun's warm embrace did little to stave off the chilling winter air that whipped away any measure of heat that still held itself to his skin.

Still, he did nothing.

Nothing but continue walking.

To where, he wasn't sure.

But he walked anyway.

He wished he could walk these roads for forever, in a vain attempt to forget the world and simply drag himself in unquestionable circles for the rest of his natural life… whatever _that_ was, now. He had hoped – initially, at least – that his walking would lead him somewhere important. Maybe his feet had a moral compass, and would steer him towards a new life – one that wasn't… _busy._

He winced when he remembered what it had been like the last time he encountered human civilization on a large scale. His mind still shivered and shook at the _pain - please make it stop - it's too much - the PAIN_ that had bubbled up around him, wrapping him in a snare and refusing to let him free, no matter how much he had struggled.

When he passed out and woke up the next morning on the outskirts of town, he felt only relief that he didn't have to relive _that_ moment again…

…at least, not _willingly_.

He could handle small villages, where maybe ten or twenty people lived. It gave him a headache, but on nowhere near the same scale as the larger towns, making it reasonable enough to ignore. It wasn't like the people he met didn't leave him alone soon after anyways.

He winced at the thought of returning to the Leaf in his current state. As much… as much as he wanted to, wanted to see his friends again, see his _home_ again, he was force into the vagabond lifestyle, forever searching for something.

 _Anything._ Anything at _all_ that could help him.

And he feared that the only one that could was gone.

* * *

On the third day, Naruto was at war.

Internally, he was exhausted – his mind had been playing a tricky game of cat and mouse with itself for what seemed like several lifetimes. A sickening thought would surface, and it would take every ounce of his being to force it back down to the dark recesses of his mind once again.

' _You did it. You were the reason Sasuke left for Orochimaru.'_

"No! No, I didn't! It wasn't me!" he would shout out loud, but no sound came out. "He's doing it because he wants to avenge his clan! But he doesn't have to do it alone!"

' _You're nothing but a burden to Sasuke. You're nothing but a burden to everyone you know.'_

His eyes would widen, unseen in the darkness. "That… that's not true! Granny Tsunade wouldn't've sent me on this training trip with the Pervy Sage-"

' _She sent you away for a reason. You're weak. You're useless. You don't deserve recognition.'_

Line after line, self-doubt after self-doubt.

On the third day, Naruto gazed into Darkness's eyes.

They were his own.

* * *

 **Author's Note(s):** WOO! IT'S POSTED! Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you: the _Kyuubi_ rewrite. This fic is about six months in the making - I've spent so much time and gone through so many word documents planning this entire thing out, frame by frame, plot twist by plot twist, that I never thought I'd actually finish the first chapter. I can't wait to see what you all think.

Right now, things seem pretty confusing, right? Good! Don't worry, that's just this first chapter. Things are going to start making much more sense as we go along.

To all the people that read _Kyuubi_ and gave me the much-loved support right out of the gate, I want to say a most heartfelt "thank you". Without you, I wouldn't be writing at all. To all the people that read _Blonding_ , a sincere "thanks" as well. The amount of love and passion I get for that fic is mind-boggling, to tell you the truth. And I appreciate every last drop of feedback and support.

Alright. Enough with the sappy first chapter AN!

The cover photo is by the fantastic (and I truly mean _fantastic_ ) artist "NightLiight" on DeviantArt. Please, head to my profile page to get the link to properly check their stuff out. It's all amazing. (And you get to look at it closer up, too!)

The story description is by my beta, Infamous Storm. His link's on my profile page, too, so go send him some love! He writes some _fantastic_ stuff. Thanks for the help, man!

It's important to note that this chapter is primarily just a feeler - I wanted to make sure there was interest in it before I continued. And there seems to be! Which is fantastic. I will, however, be waiting until most (if not all) of _Blonding_ is complete before resuming work on this fic. I want to give both of them the time they deserve. So it may not happen for a few more weeks, but Chapter 2 will be here soon.

Thanks for reading. See you then!  
-Endo

* * *

 **Uploaded on** : 1 May 2016  
 **Edited on:** 18 Sept 2016  
 **Official beta for this chapter:** Infamous Storm  
 **Final word count:** 2,546 words


	2. Anathema

_*Obligatory 'I don't own Naruto so please don't sue me' header*_

* * *

 **Of Crimson and Shadows**

 **Chapter 2 - Anathema**

* * *

 **NOTE FOR RETURNING READERS!** I rewrote the first scene of Chapter 1. Please reread that before reading this chapter. If this is your first time through, disregard this - you've read the corrected version already. ;)

* * *

In the first dream, Naruto ran.

He ran and ran and ran, and yet the plain black walls of the world around him refused to budge, his feet drifting over the earth beneath him. His calves would strain, his legs would tense, and he would push himself harder – _faster_ – until the body could no longer supply what the mind demanded.

He would sit, then, in quiet contemplation, eyes searching, scanning, _begging_ for a sign on the horizon – something to focus on, to latch onto. A landmark, a recognizable object…

… _anything_.

After he strained for an eternity, his eyes stiff and exhausted, Naruto would begin again.

And again.

 _And again…_

* * *

Naruto ambled down the village streets, hands stuffed in his pockets, his posture slouched and bored. He lumbered along, eying the shops and stalls that littered the tiny town that he and Jiraiya had arrived at not long before. The two parted ways at the gate: Jiraiya in one direction, Naruto in the other.

His hand clenched around the crumpled sheet of paper in his pocket, a pout stretched across his face.

He was alone.

Sure, he had received instructions from his… _habitual_ sensei. But they were nothing more than a list of simple tips on how to complete the giant Rasengan, and an order to stay out of trouble - each delivered with a toothy grin.

He was alone now, and probably for the foreseeable future.

A bright-painted, cozy looking dango shop drifted past him as he walked, and Naruto paused to give it a cursory glance before continuing onwards, boredom unsatiated.

His mind was itching, _begging_ for stimulation. The crowded streets of a small fishing village near the coast of the Land of Fire left a lot to be desired. Sure, he could train with what he was assigned… but he had a sneaking suspicion that his sensei had scheduled an _exorbitant_ amount of time just for the one jutsu, in the anticipation of being away for _quite_ a while.

' _There are more bathhouses here than fishing huts,'_ Naruto groaned to himself, rolling his eyes. ' _He's never gonna want to leave.'_

And so he kept walking, pack strapped to his back, the sun high in the sky. A bell rang from across the street, and a swarm of small children surged into the village center, laughing and running and dodging the waves of civilians that kept moving along, not paying any mind to them.

Naruto smiled.

He slipped into a small tea shop on the edge of the market square, shoulders aching, and bought a small cup of some sort of strange, yet pleasant, smelling herbal concoction. After he took one sip, he blanched, paid, and left – the faster the better, seeing as the excited old woman that ran the place was returning from the back room with another cup.

He wandered some more, the village streets crowding and thinning and crowding by the hour. School returned from lunch break, fishermen came back from the pier, businessmen disembarked from the boats that moored to the docks across town, school let out for the day, villagers made their grocery rounds for their evening meals. The village was a clock, and Naruto was but a forgotten cog laid flat at the bottom of the frame.

After his third lap around the village, the sun dipping far past the horizon, the streets began to empty. His only company now was the dim, humming streetlamps that _clicked_ on at the stroke of eight, dotting the village in halos of yellow light.

Naruto blinked when he realized the sun vanished, the cold embrace of night cocooning him as he walked.

One after the other, the shops closed up, their shutters latching shut, signs flickering dark.

Naruto blinked, noticing the cozy warmth of a small building nestled between a bakery and a tea shop spilling out into the night.

One shop remained open.

* * *

Naruto jerked upright.

His surroundings came into view like the lens of a camera focusing until all of the lines, all of the color before him sharpened. Reality rumbled back to life - the sounds of the birds in the spring air, the whisper of the winds through the leaves of the trees, the subtle _crunch_ of gravel underneath his sandaled feet as he struggled on.

He was walking through the forest. Again.

Naruto found himself dazing off into the past far more often now, content in the fact that he had nowhere to go, nowhere to be. His body (what was left of it, at least) moved forward on its own, pace slow and methodical as he made his way across the northern stretches of the Land of Fire, and he was bothered less and less the further into the mountains he went.

It wasn't much to go off of, but it was something.

His left thigh, gashed open on the side from a battle he never intended to win, bled jet black as he meandered. The blood trailed down his leg to the ground, staining the earth as he moved, leaving a trail behind him that stretched for miles.

Naruto didn't pay it any attention.

 _ **Running from the past will get you nowhere. Is that all you are good for?**_

He grimaced. 'I'm not running,' he said within his mind.

 _ **Semantics are just as frivolous as empty as each of the labored steps you take.**_

Naruto paused for a moment and looked down at the tattered clothing that hung down his body like shredded rags, watching the way he moved.

'Do you have any better ideas, then?' he bit out, continuing. 'I don't see _you_ suggesting where I should go or what I should do.'

 _ **Only you can make that choice, Nine-Tails.**_

Naruto froze, his body seizing up from the overexertion. 'I told you already to stop calling me that!'

 _ **Running from the truth is just as dangerous as running from the past.**_

Naruto grumbled to himself and sighed, setting off again. 'I am _not_ the Kyuubi. I don't care what you say. I will _never_ be that… _thing_.'

 _ **We are all 'things', in a manner of speaking.**_

'Yeah?' Naruto said. 'And what does that make you?'

 _ **I am reason. I am faith. I am the past, the present, and every future.**_

Naruto harrumphed. 'You sure know how to say a bunch of words that don't make any sense.'

The voice smiled inside his head. _**I am you.**_

Somehow, that didn't surprise Naruto as much as he was expecting.

 _ **You do not doubt me.**_

'Don't you mean "do not doubt _myself_ "?' Naruto said in a mocking manner.

The voice was silent.

Naruto continued walking, opting not to antagonize it. The trees blurring together into one mass as time stretched forward, the world shifting out of focus once more. The day turned to night turned to day, and still Naruto walked - battered sandals dripping blood across the winding, narrow roads of northern Fire Country.

He found himself slowing… stopping, much to his own surprise. He turned, curiosity getting the better of him, and stared off towards the horizon, tracing the thin line of black that dotted the gravel pathway.

 _ **Do you remember how you earned that wound?**_

Naruto blinked, looking down at his gaping leg. '...Yeah.'

The world spun again, and he felt his mind dipping back into the past.

* * *

"Naruto? NARUTO?!"

He could hear the man coming from miles away – at least, so it seemed. Every sound, every feeling, every sensation; it was like a hammer on his senses, his body standing shock-still to try and cope. The air brushing past his skin felt like fire, the setting evening sun burning holes into his scorched eyes.

He felt it, and yet did not.

Nothing made sense anymore.

He tried to focus his eyes, instead watching from his peripheral vision when that didn't work.

Jiraiya.

The man came sprinting down the gravel path, eyes wide and terrified. His lumbering frame _click-clacked_ with each frantic step, until he skid to a halt in front of the tree Naruto had found himself leaning against when he had woken up.

He'd tried to move long before then, but it was like someone cut the cord – his mind and body lay compartmentalized. He was vaguely aware of the world around him, but it was as if he was viewing it through a foggy window, the aperture cracked and ragged.

"Brat? Brat, are you in there?"

A pause. Jiraiya seemed to be expecting an answer, and Naruto yearned to give him one.

But his mouth didn't - _couldn't_ move.

The hope in Jiraiya's eyes was extinguished like the dying embers of a bonfire.

"I thought I had lost you, Naruto," he said, his voice quiet and forlorn. "I'm sorry…" he froze up, let out a sharp breath, continued. "I'm sorry I left you alone. I won't do that again. I promise. Not until we get home, and you're…"

It was at that moment that Jiraiya seemed to realize he was speaking to himself, and he coughed once, shaking his head of whatever troubling thoughts resided underneath his white mop of a hairdo. He smiled.

"Come on, Naruto. Let's get you… get you home, okay? One last time."

Naruto frowned internally, confused. What did he mean, one last time?

A cold terror shot through him.

Was he dead?

The world spun.

He knew that his body was moving, _careening_ in an unnatural manner, almost of its own volition - but it felt like a dream sequence; a forgotten memory. He watched his legs propel him forward, his arms lurching out, striking.

He saw the look of shock on his sensei's face as a fire-red fist burst through Jiraiya's chest.

And then, Jiraiya vanished – replaced by a smoldering log.

* * *

 _Naruto swiveled on his feet, dodging the kick aimed for his lungs._

" _Nice one, brat, but you're going to have to be quicker than that next time!" He felt the fist connect with his shoulder blade before he saw it, and Naruto went careening into a tree a moment later, the wind in his sails deflated._

 _He coughed and stood up again, smirking. "Yeah? Let's see how you handle this!"_

 _Half a dozen clones came to life with one vibrant puff of chakra, and each one fanned out across the clearing in a zigzag pattern. Two more clones appeared in front of him, guarding him, and one stepped in front of the other._

 _Jiraiya smirked, and the next moment all but the clones closest to Naruto exploded as a series of shuriken pierced their fragile skin._

 _Naruto just stuck his hand out to his side, a confident smile gracing his lips._

 _A Rasengan formed in his hand the next instant, the clone he used to summon it bursting into a plume of smug satisfaction. Naruto charged forward, roaring, aiming for Jiraiya's bemused face—_

* * *

 _BAM!_

The clearing erupted into a smattering of logs and trees and debris, and Naruto's limp body smashed over a smattering of rocks like a ragdoll. The dust cleared, and Naruto watched as Jiraiya's bloodied face stumbled into his field of view again.

"What… what the hell _are_ you?" Jiraiya said, as if the words were glass. He held himself across the stomach, his face set in cold rage. "What did you do to Naruto?"

"I'm here!" Naruto wanted to yell, to _scream_.

"You dare desecrate the dead?" Jiraiya yelled, the sound echoing off the trees.

Naruto felt his heart ( _but was it really?_ ) lurch in his chest ( _but was it_ _ **really?**_ ). Time slid into a staccato rhythm.

His body leapt forward again. Jiraiya moved just as fast. The ground beneath their feet plumed into the air with each violent footstep forward, setting sun casting shadows of dust and debris across the valley of trees.

Naruto blinked. The world blurred.

* * *

" _Try this on for size!" Naruto yelled with a triumphant roar, the clone to his side taking its leave. The Rasengan in his hand, warm and pleasant like a midsummer's sun, fluxed in anticipation._

 _Jiraiya watched and waited, a cocky smile egging him on._

 _With a splitting grin, Naruto pumped energy into his palm, growing the sphere more and more and more and-_

* * *

Blink.

A ruby-red Rasengan, dark and heavy and _cold_ , sat between his outstretched fingers.

Jiraiya was beneath him, battered and shaken, skin singed, eyes wide, breaths heaving in and out of his chest in frantic pants.

Blink.

* * *

" _Hey, kiddo, c'mere for a second."_

 _Naruto frowned, throwing his arms behind his head and strolling across the lakeside with a huff. "Lemme guess... need more 'inspiration'," Naruto gesticulated with his fingers, "for your 'research'?"_

" _Pshh," Jiraiya snorted, waving him off. "Just come here. Or do you want me to toss this popsicle in the lake?"_

 _Naruto jolted, watching as the man procured a pair of red treats from behind his back. "Wait, what? When did you go to the village to buy those?"_

" _Haven't you ever heard of Shadow Clones?" Jiraiya said._

 _Naruto watched as a trail of red - juice from the popsicle, no doubt - dripped down, down, down past Jiraiya's fingertips..._

* * *

Drip.

Naruto stared at the blot of blood that trailed down his own skin, falling onto Jiraiya's stunned face with a sound that could shatter steel.

"What are you," Jiraiya whispered.

 _ **You are his maker. His arbiter. His passer of judgment.**_

The sky turned black, the world twisting into a bizarre negative of its former self.

He felt it.

The pain, the fear... the anger.

So much anger. Blood boiling, heart stopping, earth-shattering anger - and it was directed at him.

All of it.

Naruto blinked, eyes wide, as he turned back down to face the man he had defeated in battle through some miracle of hallucination.

Jiraiya.

 _ **Yes, you feel it now.**_

Before, it was a trickle - an itch that refused to be scratched. Now, it felt like the torrent of a waterfall, slamming across him, around him, _into_ him.

It twisted through his veins, blurring his vision, distorting reality even further.

 _ **You were never his focus. Never his light, never his muse.**_

No.

 _ **Always a backdrop to his story, never the main character.**_

 _No._

 _ **You know it now - can feel it now.**_

He felt his body shake, shivering teeth marred in indecision. The Rasengan twitched and hissed, growing darker and darker, whirling like a far-stretching hurricane.

 _ **Even before. You always knew before.**_

'Shut up,' Naruto hissed inside of his mind.

 _ **The doubt, the worry - all true. All vetted by your subconscious. All foreseen.**_

'SHUT UP!'

Naruto roared, and the world went white.

* * *

 **Author's Note(s):** Wow! Yeah, so this took me a lot longer than I anticipated. It's important to note that this chapter did NOT, in fact, take me 4 months to write - rather, it just took me about 3 months and 3 weeks to get the inspiration needed to finish it. That'll tend to happen, considering this story is secondary to Blonding at the moment. But as that one draws to a close, this one will be moved up to priority number 1 - and I should be able to finish it in a relatively reasonable timeframe!

But until such time, I can only apologize, and ask that you bear with me!

REGARDLESS, we're on to chapter 2! I think it's important to stress now that this fic relies heavily on flashbacks and jumping around the timeline a lot - which is intentional. Unfortunately, due to the serialized nature of fanfiction, you early birds (read: the readers that see this as I write it, not in its completed form) are gonna have to suffer _just a bit more_ than otherwise. This story was planned and written with it being completed in mind, so please consider that when you say that this is confusing. Because it's going to be at first glance.

So again... just bare with me. I know this is unorthodox for a fanfiction, but this is an unorthodox story. And I hope it turns out half as good as I've planned it to be.

Thanks for reading, and I'll see you soon - hopefully much sooner than four months this time!  
-Endo

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 **Uploaded on** : 18 Sept 2016  
 **Official beta for this chapter:** Infamous Storm  
 **Final word count:** 2,798 words


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